See Between the Lines
by Amara the Warrior
Summary: Rei can't love...Asuka doesn't know how to love. But somehow they fit together like two pieces from opposite worlds. One is fire...the other is ice. Is it possible to see hope between the lines of truth or is it all an allusion? ReiAsuka pairing...YURI!
1. The Beginning

Disclaimer: Evangelion is not mine unfortunately; Gainax does.

Note: This is a yuri between Rei and Asuka! So I don't want any flames because you don't like this kind of stuff.

She touched her face gently, wincing at the dull sting that came from earlier. _Am I a doll? Is this who I am? _Today was one of her good days. Rei Ayanami only got slightly injured due to a malfunction with EVA 00. It usually never malfunctioned; but lately it was going out of control.

_I wonder if it's me? I wonder if my own insecurities are the cause of its problems? _She pulled a bag of cotton balls out of her medicine cabinet. After pouring a little amount of a rubbing alcohol into the fuzzy element, she dabbed the cut on her cheek with it. She winced at the stinging pain of the cut being cleaned and the forming bruise under it.

A tear of solitude rolled down her pale, soft cheek. She despised being alone. She wanted to be held, to be loved by a human being and to return those feelings. She had one person in mind. Whenever she saw this being, she felt like she was flying through the clouds. Her flaming red hair caused Rei's breath to catch in her throat. Asuka Langley Sohru was an amazing girl who turned Rei's world upside down.

When she first met Asuka, she had been cold and reclusive and Asuka had been fiery and mean. She had teased her and degraded her, but Rei stilled couldn't help but fall in love with her. _Her eyes…her face…the way she walks…I always feel so drawn to her. I feel like I can't breath when I'm around her. What is this I'm feeling? _She stared at her reflection for a few more minutes, trying to figure out the answer to her questions.

She raised a finger and touched the glass of the mirror. It was cold to the touch that also reminded her of her own coldness. She started to sob quietly. She couldn't take it anymore. The pain…the solitude…it was just eating her from the inside. _I don't want to be alone…I want someone to love me_.

* * *

Asuka beat the wall in frustration. She was having the worst day. _I'm so worthless. Why is it always wonder- girl and Shinji who get the recognition? _She hated having competition, especially in love. She had seen the way Shinji had looked at Rei. She saw the way his eyes gleamed when they rested upon her pale form. It made Asuka boil with anger. _Wonder-girl is mine you moron! _She always felt possessive when it came to her. Something about Rei Ayanami made her want to rip her hair out.

_Why is it every time she talks to me, she seems so bold? No one else can act with that much courage around me. They either cower beneath me or back away quietly. It gets boring every once in a while. _

She examined her bruised fist after punching a hole in the wall. She smirked to herself. Misato was going to have her ass this time. This was the third hole she had punched in a wall this week! She didn't really care at all though. Misato could just kiss her ass. She could care less about what anyone thought of her.

_All I want is for someone to love me. I want someone to hold me and take care of me when I can't take of myself. I don't want to be a burden though. I want to be the dominant one in a relationship. Screw male dominance…I always take the lead. _She was always that way, ever since her mother committed suicide. She had felt the need to grow up and in the process pushed away everyone away she had ever cared about.

Kaji was the first man she had ever felt like she could love forever. Sure there was a huge age difference but she didn't care. She didn't even care about Misato's relationship with him at the time! She knew that deep down; Kaji really loved **her **and not Misato! _Why would he even want to be with that disgusting woman!_ She wanted to slap herself when she heard about his death. She used to lie in bed at night and wonder how he died and what was going through his mind before his spirit left his body.

_I wonder if he was thinking of me…or was he thinking of that bitch Misato! _She hit the wall again in frustration…but this time not so hard. At least the wall would be spared from her fury for the rest of the day. Right now she wanted to yell at someone. The person on her mind at that moment was Rei. She wanted to make the first child cry a river of pain.

She opened the door and walked briskly out of the bathroom. She opened her closet and looked over her wardrobe. _Wow…I can't believe I haven't even worn half this stuff!_ She grabbed a medium length red dress that accentuated her curves. She wanted to attract a lot of attention to herself. Then maybe wonder girl would actually show some emotion around her. She looked at her hair. She groaned with frustration. Her hair looked like that every single day; always in two pigtails with the loose hair flowing down her back. But not today; no today she was going to try something different.

She grabbed her brush and pulled her elastics out of her hair so that it was lying on her slim shoulders. She brushed her hair until it shone beautifully. Then she just left it down. She looked the finished result in the mirror. She was beautiful…the dress fit perfectly and her red hair made her look like some sort of goddess. She was happy with her look and left out the front door. She was going to go shopping with Hikari since she promised she would yesterday. She didn't know that she would see someone very unexpected there though.

* * *

Asuka boarded the bus and sat down in the first empty seat she could find. All the men were looking at her. She felt giddy from all the attention she was getting. She pulled out her CD player and pressed the play button. A few seconds later, she heard the sound of Megumi Hayashibara's music ringing in her ears. She had always respected her because of her amazing singing voice. Not many people's voices could compare to hers; at least that what she thought.

After ten minutes or so she heard the familiar sound of the bus's brakes squealing. _This must be my stop_ she thought to herself. She got off gracefully as almost everyone watched her do so. She smirked. She loved getting that kind of attention. It was nice to be noticed. She grinned when she saw Hikari standing around waiting for her. Her anger started to boil when she saw Rei standing with her.

She stomped over to Hikari. "Hey what's wonder girl doing here?" she hissed loudly, not caring if Rei heard her or not.

"I invited her," Hikari managed to stammer. "Sssshe wwwaasss wwalking arround aaalll aaalonne."

Asuka laughed cruelly. "Oh I get it…so you felt sorry for wonder girl?" She turned to look at Rei. Her face was blank without expression. "Well aren't you going to say anything? Or are you really a doll who just follows orders?" Her face continued to show no emotion.

"I am not a doll," she answered plain and simple. "I follow the orders I am given but that does not make me a doll." Asuka growled and slapped her across the face. Hikari was helpless to do anything to stop her.

"Yes you are. You follow every order Commander Ikari gives you! What are you his slave?" Rei remained stationary; she didn't even cover the hand imprint with the palm of her hand.

"I am not his slave. I only do what he tells me to because it's the only way…" Asuka grabbed her blouse and pulled her to face her.

"Only way? What the hell are you talking about dammit?" Rei removed her hands gently. Asuka felt her breath catch in her throat. _Her hands…they're so soft and silky._

"It's the only way I will find peace. Is that what you wanted to hear?" Her voice remained monotone and cold. It sent shivers down Hikari's back. _Is it possible for someone to be so devoid of emotion? Maybe she isn't even human._ Asuka let Rei get off easily on this one, but next time she wouldn't be so lucky.

Note: So, what do you think? Ya like it? Please send me reviews I want to know what you all think.


	2. The Nightmare

A/N: Well after giving it much thought I decided to continue the story. The majority of the reviews were good so I'm going to continue. Yay!

Disclaimer: No, no, no….Evangelion is not mine. BLAH!

Asuka tossed and turned in her sleep. She was having a nightmare. It was about her mother.

Asuka never had a happy childhood. There was always something going wrong in her life as a child. Her parents were renowned scientists. Her mother worked for GEHIRN. This would later become NERV's third branch of the industry. Her father was a scientist for an unknown organization.

Sadly, Asuka's parents never really spent any time with her. It was very saddening for her; her parents always neglected her. There were times when she thought that they didn't care about her. And perhaps that was true.Her motherwas almost never around, and when she was, it was not a pretty sight.

Her mother worked on the 2nd EVA unit on the german branch of NERV. Back then it was called GEHRIN. This in itself was an honor. Everyone who knew Asuka, knew her mother's feats. This caused Asuka to become an almost non-being. Her mother got all the attention. It was annoying for her to have her childhood friends talk nonstop about her mother's achievements without even considering her own.

Asuka was a bright child for her age. She received all A's in school and was learning German, Japanese, English and French. These were impressive achievements for her. Yet she never got the praise she wanted. It all went to her mother.

Her mother, Kyoto Zepplelin Soryu, was an intelligent scientist of an average height. Her hair was a fiery red like Asuka's, and her eyes were a jade-green. She was clearly the cream of the crop.

Her father Raidon Soryu was tall with pearl-black hair and dark blue eyes. He too, was incredibly good-looking. He also was a gifted with science and in political science. Asuka's mother wasn't nearly as well known as him. There weren't people alive who didn't know his name and his achievements. He was an amazing human being. And Asuka detested him.

Asuka wanted to be recognized. It was the type of person she was. That was why she was always so boastful and proud in order for her the receive the recognition she sought.

Her mother was the same way. At home, Kyoto always bragged about her latest feats in the science field. It was her who was the test pilot for EVA unit 2. She was the one who came up with the design for it. She knew the secrets.

But she was never able to tell Asuka, as the two of them never got on well. Kyoto never listened to Asuka's feelings, and Asuka was too frustrated with her to even want to listen. Her father was never home either. He was always working a science experiment or something else related to that. What a wonderful family Asuka had.

Her problems with her family never ceased. If anything, they got worse.

The day Kyoto lost her sanity would always be embedded in her mind. Kyoto was testing EVA unit 2 to make sure it was in the right condition to be used for GEHRIN. However, the testing didn't go as planned. The EVA turned against her. Instead of allowing her to control it, it forced her to become a part of it, causing her to lose a part of her conscious as a result.

When she was ejected from the EVA, her normally 'alive' eyes were clouded with despair. She was in a catatonic state. She acted like she didn't know where she was. She started to babble incessantly about demons and angels. No one could catch a word of what was saying. She had lost her sanity in a matter of minutes.

Asuka was told that day that her mother has been committed because of a permanent loss of mental stability. Asuka couldn't believe it. Her own mother, the strong and successful scientist, has gone insane?

Kyoto was committed to a nearby mental hospital in Tokyo-2. Asuka visited her a few times but never enjoyed it because of her mother's complete lack of comprehending her surroundings. She talked to a doll that she had made in her free time, more than she had ever talked to Asuka. She actually thought the doll _was_ Asuka.

This sickened Asuka; her mother reduced to this carnage? What was happening? What drove her insane?

Her father did not visit Kyoto either. He claimed it was too painful for him to see his wife reduced to a smoldering heap of mental instability. Kyoto has to be given shots of Thorazine and Serentil so that her doctor could control her. It was imperative that she be controlled as she was prone to undergo episodes of psychosis.

Her doctor's name was Haya Kamasaki. She was a petite woman, with short, cropped black hair and dark brown eyes. She looked very Japanese to any observing eye.

She gave Kyoto the best of care, giving her the most effective medication and trying to give her emotional support. However, Kyoto hardly cared for her doctor. She often called her "slut" and "whore". There was a reason for that though.

Haya was having an affair with Raidon. And Kyoto knew this. She could tell by her husband's lack of visits and lack of any sort of emotional support. It only furthered her madness.

No one could blame Raidon for committing that vile sin. He simply could not deal with his wife's loss of contact with reality. It put too much tension and stress on him. Kyoto either threw fits, or stared up at the wall with a chilling indifference. She was dead to him.

The person who was the most affected by Kyoto's insanity was Asuka. There was no one she respected more than her mother surprisingly. Even though there were times when she wanted to strangle her own mother, she still admired her, strange how things happen. Now that person was gone.

In order to give Asuak that "respected" person, he entered into a relationship with Haya. Asuka had no knowledge of this; Kyoto did.

After finding out about her husband's betrayal, she started to mutilate herself. She would carve strange symbols into her arms and legs. Haya almost thought Kyoto was trying to tell her something. She told Raidon in fear of what she thought Kyoto was going to do to herself. Raidon became concerned and advised her to up the dosage. He still cared about Kyoto despite her madness.

Haya did as she was asked, but it only made things worse. Kyoto felt everyone was going against her. So when everyone was asleep or off duty, she grabbed a cold, metal wire and hung herself from the ceiling.

Sadly, Asuka was the first to see this. She has recently been accepted into the GEHRIN program for the second impact children. She was going to tell her mother the great news. She wanted her to be proud of her.

When she opened the door, the sight she beheld shocked her. Her mother, her beautiful mother was suspended from the ceiling by a steel wire. She was dead. Asuka screamed in terror. That very image haunted her. That was what her nightmare was about. Almost all of her nightmares involved her reliving that image.

Asuka awoke in a cold sweat, her eyes dilated and heart throbbing. "Mama," she whispered.

* * *

Rei looked out the window with blatant indifference. School was never one of her strong points. She never had any friends. This was mostly because she was not an approachable person. Most people felt uncomfortable talking to her. They had a right to think this way. Rei was a silent being.

She was always that way, even when she was a child. Sure she would smile every now and then, but she never really showed emotion. She was a robot without a soul.

She felt a tap on her back; it was Shinji. She regarded him without any emotion whatsoever. She had a feeling that this made Shinji feel uncomfortable. It was obvious by the way he was figiting and shuffling his feet.

She looked at his face. His ocean-blue eyes and dark brown hair were his best features. He looked like a more feminine version of Gendo Ikari.

Gendo Ikari…the man she had sworn her loyalty to. She would have killed herself for that man. She was his servant.

She didn't mind being a servant. It was actually a more productive use or her time. Most of the time she wasted on homework, and herself. But a serving a higher human being than herself…that was worth doing.

It was obvious Rei didn't value her life. She practically shoved it in everyone else's faces. She was regarded as "weird" by her other classmates for isolating herself from humanity and for not showing any emotion. Despite what they thought she had emotions. She just didn't like to show them. Was there something wrong with that? How many people are safe from showing their emotions? Rei felt that she was safe if she kept something everything inside.

Even though she never remembered her childhood, she knew she must have been teased. She knew no one must have liked her. She couldn't understand why though? What was there to hate about her? Was she unattractive, mean, and dull? Did she have some sort of horrid trait that she didn't know about?

Rei never understood the concept of love. All the kissing and hugging, she saw no point for it all. Why did a human find it necessary to have a relationship with another human being?

She never had any feelings for certain human beings. Well, except maybe Asuka. That redhead sparked some kind of thought process for her. Even though Asuka was cruel, and pride-dominated. Rei couldn't' help but admire the girl.

Asuka had what she would never have: self-value. Perhaps Asuka had too much of it though. That was a problem. However, it usually worked to Asuka's advantage.

Rei knew Asuka wasn't very good at relationships. She had no sense of feeling or love. She couldn't be nice or caring. _Strange how humans act._

"Umm…Rei?" She blinked her eyes, leaving her fantasy world. Reality became clearer.

"Yes," she responded quietly.

"Misato wanted me to tell you that commander Ikari would like to speak with you," he explained with slight distaste. It was obvious to Rei that Shinji and his father did not get along. The two hated each other. Rei couldn't understand that.

Commander Ikari was a good man at heart. She knew; he saved her life once. A few months ago, there was an accident with EVA unit 1. Rei would have gotten seriously injured if it weren't for Ikari burning his hands while trying to open the hatch. She was indebted to him.

To this day, she kept his cracked glasses. To her, the glasses were a souvenir. She loved them. No one understood why she did that, and she wouldn't elaborate to him or her either.

"I see," she muttered a bare whisper. "Let's go."

Asuka wiped her face with a towel. She didn't know what was going on. She was feeling fine in the morning, and then suddenly she was overcome with fatique and cold sweat. Maybe she was sick?

"Who cares," she muttered to herself. "Probably just something to do with my period," She was having her period unfortunately. Asuka saw no reason for periods. She wasn't planning on having children so why did it matter?

Children were for fools who had no life. That wasn't Asuka; she was going to be successful and competent. She was going to kick everyone else's ass in the workplace. Being the second child was really working out for her.

Asuka found out that she was the second child six years ago. She was about 8 years old, give or take a year. At that time, her mother was in the hospital. And her father sent her to live with her father's lover, Haya.

A strange man came to the door, asking for Asuka. Asuka answered the man. He explained to her, the destiny that fate had in store for her. Of course, Asuka being Asuka, did not believe him. How could she believe that she was the second child? It just didn't make sense.

By the end of their conversation, Asuka was a believer. The man showed her the mark that was on her wrist. It was a strange, alien symbol. And now she finally knew what it meant. She was truly the second child. That was her fate.

After that fateful day, Asuka was sent to GEHRIN for testing of the EVAs. That was her path into NERV.

There were times when she actually regretted it. She had hoped being a second child would allow her to be on top. So far, that's proved to be mostly untrue. Shinji, was on top when his EVA went beserk. How scary it was to witness that. The machine twisted and trembled with what looked like rage. It's eyes turned a ghastly green and it as letting out a violent roar. It sent chills down everyone's spine. Asuka couldn't help being a little jealous. She wanted that recognition. She needed that recognition. It was hers for the taking.

Just then her friend Hikari walked in. Hikari was a relatively small girl with straight mahogany hair pulled into two braids and beautiful copper eyes.

She was supposedly Asuka's best and only friends. It's hard to believe how and why the two are together. Asuka was too cruel and blunt for Hikari's kindness and by the book for demeanor.

Hikari was the class president. Asuka envied her for this. That was a position Asuka hungered for. Well, most positions of power Asuku wanted. This obviously was no different.

Hikari regarded her with concern. Asuka had been gone form class for at least 20 minutes. People were starting to worry about her.

It seemed to Asuka that Hikari always worried about her. Well, it was understandable, considering Asuka's personality. Asuka would do anything to win, even if it put her life in danger. She didn't care.

"Asuka," she asked. "Are you okay?" Asuka looked at her and rubbed her eyes.

"I'm fine," she said with a normal tone. "I've just been feeling a little sick lately, that's all." She hated it when people worried about her. Was she that pathetic that she needed to be babied at every turn? How sickening.

"Well, then maybe you should go back to class?" Hikari suggested. Asuka shrugged and followed the brunette out of the bathroom.

**A/N: I feel like it's been forever since I wrote for this story. I think it has. Well, I haven't seen the show in a long time. It just hasn't been on Demand. So I wasn't able to watch it. If there's something I screwed up on, please tell me. It think for the most part, I got the characters and setting right.**


	3. Trust

**Disclaimer: Blah, blah, blah…Evangelion is not mine…it belongs to Gainax.**

**_Chapter Three: Trust_**

"Rei," Gendo Ikari spoke slowly. "It's good to see you again." Rei smiled at the man she respected and admired the most. He was her master.

"It's good to see you too Commander Ikari," the blue-haired girl answered formally. Rei Ayanami was always one to formalize conversations. It wasn't that she was a deadpan personality; she was just completely ignorant of the world around her. The sordid details she managed to obtain were from television. Rei watched television to learn more about the world. She had a small tv in her apartment so it was possible to do so.

"Are you wondering why I asked you here?" He stared at her with the trademark blue eyes that were found in Shinji. Those very eyes were beautiful.

"No," she answered simply. "I am here to do what is asked of me." Gendo chuckled at her loyalty to him. Rei certainly was his most prized pilot, next to Shinji. Shinji's EVA was a blessing to NERV. Its berserk mode made it the reining champion.

"Good," he chuckled. "I'm glad you're loyal to me. You should be." Rei bowed her head.

"What is it that you want me to do?" she asked. Gendo got up from his chair and put his hand on her shoulder. His mouth was just inches from her ear.

The entire room looked a lot like a prison.

There were bars on the windows, and the room smelt of death. Apparently Gendo Ikari liked it that way. It wasn't surprising. That man was full of mysteries.

Rei didn't mind the musty room. She was used to places like that.

Rei Ayanami lived in a tiny apartment that looked extremely organized. Even though that was the case, there was barely enough room for her to move, let alone function. Her clothes were always neatly placed in the drawer and her bed on the floor was almost too small for her. These clearly weren't good living conditions, but Rei didn't mind.

"I need you to get that bitch Asuka out of NERV," he whispered. Rei taken aback, but she didn't look it. She never looked like any of the emotions she felt.

"Why do you want pilot Soryu to leave? I find her a very acceptable pilot," she questioned his authority. Gendo removed his hand from her shoulder, his fingertips grazing her bare skin. This was the first time she had ever questioned his authority.

"Why are you questioning my authority," he asked quiety with his back turnd to her. Rei could tell he was silently glaring.

"Pilot Soryu is my friend," Rei explained in a monotone voice. "I don't want here to leave." Gendo smirked at the confession. Rei had feelings for the hormonal redhead. He would have laughed if he wasn't ready to kill someone.

"Your friend," he asked inquisitively and turned to look her straight in the eye. "She treats you worse than dirt and never even tries to be friendly with you." Rei looked at the ground.

He was trying to make her feel worthless.

She wasn't going to fight it…because she agreed with him. She _was_ worthless. She didn't deserve the gift of life.

"Still, she is my friend," Rei repeated, some emotion straining in her voice. "I don't want her to leave." Gendo sighed. Rei was being defiant. What was he going to do with her?

It was like her to rebel; usually she followed orders without question. She had an emotional attachment to Asuka.

"Have you seen her seen her sync ratio? It's lower than ever! She's been nothing but trouble, I want her gone," he snapped. Rei stood her ground. She wasn't afraid.

"Then I will go comfort her," she said softly. "I am her friend." She walked away from Gendo. It was strange. She defied her master for a girl who probably hated her.

* * *

Asuka collapsed onto her bed in pain. Something was not right; but she didn't know what it was.

"Mama," she whispered. "Help me."

The sick feeling she had felt in the bathroom had not ceased when she left with Hikari. If anything, it intensified. She didn't know what was wrong with her. She thought it was something to do with her period, but that couldn't be right. They weren't cramps; it was a sick feeling in her stomach and mind. Was she going to die?

"I hope not," she muttered to herself. She didn't exactly want to die now; she was only 14 years old. She was too young to die.

Yes, there were times when Asuka wished she would die, but now was not one of those times. She needed to be alive; something told her to be alive.

What? What told her to be alive? It surely wasn't a voice; Asuka wasn't a schizophrenic. Perhaps it was a feeling?

"Asuka," a voice called out to her. She pulled her head out of the pillow. It was Misato's voice.

Asuka's room was dirty. She didn't care about where she threw her stuff. She hated having her room as clean as a pin.

Asuka got out of bed, stepped over some dirty underwear and bras, and went to the door. Misato's worried face greeted her.

"What," she asked with an irritated growl. It was obvious she was in a bad mood. She wasn't cheerful, or even trying to be friendly.

"I'm just checking to see if you're okay," Misato asked. "I was worried about you." Asuka laughed at Misato's attempt at trying to be civil.

"You were worried? That's a load of crap Misato and you know it!" Misato glared at the young redhead. She could be a huge bitch sometimes.

"Excuse me for trying to be nice to you," she spat. "I though you would at least appreciate someone being nice to you. Especially with your fragile standing with NERV!" Asuka froze. She was in trouble with NERV? What was Misato talking about?

"What do you mean 'my fragile standing with NERV," Asuka advanced on the purple haired woman. "Is there something _I _should know?" Misato sighed. It was going to be hard telling Asuka the bad news. Who knew if Asuka would become violent?

"Your sync ratio is down and you haven't really been part of the team," Misato solemnly explained. "If you keep screwing up, if you mess up one more time, you won't be piloting anymore." Asuka's eyes widened in shock after she heard that.

"**WHAT**," she yelled. "**WHAT DO YOU MEAN I WON'T BE PILOTING ANYMORE? YOU NEED ME TO FIGHT THE ANGELS**," she huffed. "Without me you're nothing…**NOTHING!"** Misato stepped back a little. Asuka was _steamed._ She had expected it nonetheless. Asuka was moody. There were times when she was afraid to talk to her for fear of getting beaten.

"Asuka calm down," Misato lowered her voice and kept her distance. She didn't want to get slapped.

**"I WILL NOT CALM DOWN!"** Asuka raised her voice to an almost screeching level, and then started to cry. "I'm going to lose the only thing I'm good at. How could you?" She slammed the door in Misato's face. Misato sighed. _There goes Asuka again._ There really wasn't anything she could do about that. Asuka was as unpredictable as the weather.

Misato went back into the kitchen and sat down. The kitchen was a mess, as usual. There were a few beer cans littered on the floor; from last night no doubt.

If there was one thing Misato loved more than men, it was alchohol. Just the taste of it had her yearning for more. She was a self-admitted alcoholic.

Why was she an alcoholic? Misato never had the best childhood. Her father was almost never around, and when she was, it was never heart warming.

Her mother cried every time her father didn't come home. This invoked a deep hatred for that man. She loathed seeing her mother cry. That beautiful pale face, stained with tears, her brown eyes puffy and red. She tried comforting her mother, but it never worked. She never could take away the pain.

Don't miss understand, her father wasn't a bad man; he was just too wrapped up in his work. His missed out on his family-life and didn't get to see Misato grow up.

She grabbed a beer from the fridge and set it down on the table. She raised the can to her lips and sipped the bitter beverage. Ah…the cold taste of alcohol, her escape from pain.

She heard a knock on the door. Sensing it was Shinji or someone else, she got up and answered it. She never expected to see the small blue-haired, albino girl standing there. It was odd.

Rei almost never came to Misato's apartment. Why was she here now?

Rei was on odd child; that much was certain. She almost never talked, and when she did, Misato wished she hadn't. The girl's voice was a chilling one. She almost sounded like a hurt child.

Rei was so quiet. Why was she so quiet?

"Major Katsuragi," the quiet voice spoke. Misato gave the albino a small smile. She was really a sweet girl, even if she was a little weird.

"Yes Rei," she asked cheerfully. She wanted to make the girl feel at home, since Rei practically had no warm home.

Rei was created in a test tube. According to Ritsuke, she was made through the salvaged remains of Yui Ikari. She technically could be considered Shinji's half mother. It was probably awkward for Shinji. Misato had noticed he wasn't spending as much time with Rei. It was sad.

"Is pilot Soryu here?" she asked meekly. Misato turned in the direction in the direction of Asuka's room. Would she want Rei to be there?

"Umm…yeah she is," she answered.

"May I see her?" Rei asked. Misato nodded and opened the door all the way, allowing Rei to come in. Somehow Misato knew she had just made a huge mistake. It was obvious Asuka didn't like Rei very much. Why did Rei want to see Asuka of all people?

Rei went up to Asuka's door and knocked softly. She didn't want to disturb the redhead's slumber, if she was sleeping.

"Go away," came the boisterous reply from Asuka who had been crying on her bed for some time. Whoever it was, she didn't want to deal with him or her.

"Pilot Soryu," Rei called. Asuka got up from her bed and opened the door.

"What do you want _wondergirl_?"she spat in the albino's face.

"I heard about your fragile standing with NERV, and I wanted to comfort you," she answered. Asuka raised her eyebrow.

"Huh?" she gasped. "Why do you wanna help me all of a sudden? Do I look like I need saving? Huh…_wondergirl_?" Rei seemed unaffected by all this. She could deal with Asuka's violence and rage where most couldn't. How and why? She didn't know. She just didn't let it bother her.

"Well?" Asuka questioned Rei again. "What do you have to say for yourself?" Again, Rei continued to do nothing.

"You worthless doll," Asuka hissed and shut the door in Rei's face. Misato came down the hall, wearing an expression of worry.

"Oh," she grimaced. "Sorry Rei. Asuka's not exactly the best person to talk to." She took Rei's arm and guided her to the door.

"Come on, let me get you something to eat."

**A/N: Thanks for reading and reviewing!**


	4. Expression

**A/N: Thanks to fanficfan141, breaktherules, warlord-xana, and invaderchiaki for reviewing. I hope you come back and enjoy this chapter.**

**Disclaimer: Come on people, do I LOOK rich?

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**Chapter 4: Expression

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Flashes of memories went in every crevice of her mind. She was recollecting all the times she was with Asuka, her comrade and friend. Slowly, she shut her eyes as she relished the memories. However, the memories soon changed to visions that were not memories at all, but almost a tap into Asuka's consciousness.

Asuka was a child, running around, happy as can be. She looked truly happy, much different from the way things were now. She had a doll in her hand. The doll resembled her appearance with the hair and body. She was giggling maniacally, not evil but pure joy.

Her mother stood in the corner, with her back turned to her daughter. It was as if Asuka didn't even exist. She was working diligently on a computer, ignoring her daughter.

Her father was in another corner, with a bottle of whiskey in one hand and his arm around a bimbo. He was laughing. The room had a reddish tint to it. It was the kitchen and the vision caused it to be slightly tilted.

Then the mood changed. Asuka began to cry. It was terrible hearing her cry; it pierced through the walls and just life itself. She was so distraught. There seemed to be no end to her unhappiness. She fell to the floor and furiously beat her fists on the ground. "I hate you," she yelled. "I fucking hate you!"

"No one consoled her. They all left her alone. She was miserable, like the other children who piloted EVAs, but she was ashamed of her pain and thus tried to hide it. Big children were supposed to be strong. Weakness was not an option.

Her blue eyes cried out for help before the vision completely disappeared.

* * *

"Rei?" a voice called. "Rei!"

The albino girl stopped dreaming for a moment.

"Yes," she muttered. It was a good vision. Well, it was good in the sense that she was able to see Asuka.

"Is there something wrong?" Misato looked at her companion with worried eyes. "You haven't touched your food."

She looked down at her plate: sushi and white rice. She shrugged, brushing her white hair out of her eyes. "I'm sorry," she spoke softly. "I'm not very hungry right now."

Misato patted her head affectionately. "It's all right," she smiled. "Really, you've had a rough day."

Rei didn't even nod. The people in the restaurant all walked around in frenzy, all trying to find places for each other. They all had such simple lives. She wished her life was as simple as theirs.

"Major Katsuragi," Rei asked.

Misato rolled her eyes. "Rei, I told you once and I'll tell you again, call me Misato."

""I feel more comfortable calling you Major, thank you."

Misato sighed. "All right, I can live with that."

A small silence ensured, until Rei asked an uncomfortable question.

"What will become of me?"

"Misato looked up from eating. Some food fell on her purple blouse. She mentally cursed at the fact of ruining a perfectly good shirt. She hated going shopping for new clothes.

"Huh?" she was a little surprised at Rei's question. Normally, people didn't ask questions like that.

"What will become of me?"

Misato raised an eyebrow. "What do you mean?" What a troubling question for a girl to ask!

"What will become after the angels are defeated?"

Misato's eyes widened at the rephrased question. She didn't know how to answer it. And she definitely didn't want to make Rei upset, although, she didn't really know if Rei ever _did_ get upset.

"Well…umm…nothing…I think," she stuttered.

"Are you sure?" Rei probed. "That does not sound like an acceptable answer."

"Yes, I'm sure," Misato replied quickly. To be honest, she didn't know what Rei's fate would be. She loved that girl though, like a daughter. She couldn't see how an old man would want to kill her, why anyone would want to kill her. Rei was the sweetest girl.

Rei became silent again. Actually, she was almost always silent. She only talked when there was reason to.

"What did you wish to speak to me about?"

Misato looked up again.

"Asuka."

"Pilot Soryu?"

She cleared her throat and pushed a purple tendril out of her face. "Rei you act, well, rather strange around her and I was just worried about your emotional safety," she began confidently and seriously. "Asuka _can_ be unpredictable at times and I wanted to make sure that you know that."

Rei stared at her. "Pilot Soryu's unpredictable emotions are no surprise for me, Major," she replied coldly.

"Why do you like her?" Misato looked into Rei's eyes. They were a beautiful crimson color. It was a lot like seeing fire in her eyes.

"Do I _need_ a reason to like her?" Rei saw no logic in that question. Humans! To her, 'like' and 'dislike' were merely states of mind. To 'like' or 'dislike' a person needed no reason; it was merely the way a person perceived another human being.

"No, I guess not," Misato giggled. She had to hand it to Rei, that girl was very intelligent for someone who knew so little of the world. It was a shame she had not had children. She could have used a little Rei.

"Do you like Pilot Soryu," Rei asked.

"Yes. She has her bad points, but yes, I like her."

"Does she like me?"

"I…" Misato didn't know what to say to the girl. Asuka had always referred to Rei many times as a "doll" and "wonder girl". There was no way Misato could tell her that!

"I _think_ she likes you," Misato slowly began. "I can ask her again tonight. Does that sound good?"

Rei smiled.

"That sounds acceptable."

* * *

Asuka heard a knock on her door and went to go open it. She grabbed a T-shirt and sweatpants and threw them on. She pulled her red hair back into a pony tail, growling as her bangs obstructed her vision. After making sure she was decent, she opened the door. She groaned when she was who was there.

"What the hell do you want Misato?"

Misato tried her best to remain cheerful but it was hard to be that way with Asuka. "I came to ask you a question," she said sweetly. "May I come in?"

Asuka cursed and let her in. Misato smiled when she saw the room. It was neat and organized, just like Asuka's work personality. She plopped down on the bed.

"I was talking to Rei this afternoon at a restaurant. We had a very interesting conversation."

Asuka yawned, stretching her arms in an obnoxious way. "Spit it out Misato."

Misato's eyes darkened at the rudeness of the comment. "She asked me if you liked her!" Misato said calmly. Asuka started dumbfounded at her. "Well, do you?"

"What kind of a question is that to ask?" she scoffed. "Wonder girl probably has rocks in her head again."

Misato rolled her eyes and sighed. "I'll take that as a no." She got up to leave. "It's a shame, because she likes you. Why she does, I'll never know, but she does. Good night Asuka." She shut the door.

Asuka slumped onto her bed. Why was Rei so weird? Why did she ask such weird question? What was wrong with her?

Asuka put her face in her hands. She should be asking herself that question. She was weird, she was the one with the problem. What was wrong with her?

She pouted. Her entire life, the only person she could love was herself. Sometimes not even then; she wanted things to be different. One day, things would change.

* * *

Rei stood outside the NERV building. It was approximately 9:00 in the morning on a Tuesday. She shivered. There was a slight cold breeze blowing through her. It was fall, probably the prettiest time of the year for her. Rei liked nature; it was her reason for living.

She smiled as she heard a bird chirping. "Those birds are happier than I am," she whispered to herself.

It was true, animals didn't have the kind of burdens humans had. They didn't despair or even regret. They lived a peaceful kind of life. The kind of life Rei wanted so badly.

She smoothed out her gray dress. It reached her knees and was made prettier by the white tights she was wearing underneath. Her black buckle shoes clunked against the stone uneasily as she made her way into the NERV building. She rubbed her bare shoulders; her dress barely covered her arms. Why did she wear clothing like that?

She sighed as she pushed open the door. Scientists were running to and fro, completely oblivious to her presence. Rei liked it that way. A few even bumped into her. However, Rei didn't say anything when they did so nothing could really be said.

She continued strolling through the halls, looking at the luscious posters that littered the walls. They were mostly advertisements for NERV with slogans like "Make NERV a part of your life" or "Let NERV make a difference". Rei wondered if after all that had happened, that if NERV really could make a difference.

As she made her way downstairs, she heard yelling. It sounded a lot like Asuka's voice. When she finally made it to the bottom of the stairs, she could finally see what was going on.

Asuka was screaming at Misato. It was about her going out to fight an Angel they had just discovered. "Why won't you let me pilot?" she roared.

Misato covered her eyes and tried to keep her composure. "Asuka, please listen to me."

Asuka's nostrils flared and her eyes surged with a fire no one had known before. "Like hell I'm going to listen to you!" she yelled. "I was chosen as the Second Child, I want to be paid my respects!"

Misato rolled her eyes. She looked over to Ritsuko and hoped her friend could help her control this unruly girl.

"Asuka," a low feminine voice piped up. "It's just that your synch ratio is low today. Why don't you rest, you look tired."

Misato smiled at the woman. She didn't know what she would do without Ritsuko.

Her and Ritsuko had known each other since college. Misato smiled to herself. _College…those were some good times._

Her entire life after the Second Impact had been silence. She had gone mute after the incident and had refused to talk to anyone. Even her close family had been shut out. They were all dead to her. It was not that she desired to push her family away; it was that she was unable to get that horrible vision of her father dying out of her. It haunted her dreams and followed her through life.

When she met Ritsuko, Misato felt she had finally met someone she could trust. Ritsuko was shy and restrained and Misato felt she could be any person she wished in front of her. She chose to be a gregarious and sassy woman. It was a change, having all that attention drawn to her. She wasn't used to it. The men especially noticed her. One particular man was Kaji.

Misato frowned. She didn't want to think about that.

Rei stood there stiffly, waiting for someone to notice her. After a few minutes, Misato finally did. She gasped and her eyes widened. "Rei!"

Asuka and Dr. Akagi turned around. Asuka snorted. "So I guess Wonder girl's here to save the day, huh?"

Misato rolled her eyes. She went up to Rei and took her by the wrist. She pulled her into the center of the room.

"Rei," Misato spoke consisely. "Asuka can't pilot today so we need you and Shinji to pilot the EVAs." Rei turned to leave. "Oh, and take this," Misato threw her Rei's white suit. Rei caught it with precision and continued into the other room. It was the room where the Evangelions were. Shinji was already there. He was dressed in his blue suit and seemed ready for takeoff. When he caught sight of her, he began to fidget nervously. She guessed she must have made him nervous.

"So…um…Rei," he mumbled. "What do you think of this?" He was gesturing to the situation they were in.

Rei merely started at him, making him more uneasy. "I find it a very unacceptable situation," she said without emotion. "Pilot Soryu's not here."

Shinji back off a bit after that remark, his confidence dissolved. "Uh…yeah," he muttered. He stared at Rei. There was something so enigmatic about that girl. She didn't value her life and she thought of the strangest things. He sighed; Rei was a bizarre woman.

Rei looked at the Evangelions. They were magnificent and huge, their greatness filling the entire room. Rei looked at her own EVA: EVA Unit 00. She had been in two EVAs (not counting Unit 01) for most of her missions. The first EVA was a test version and was the color yellow. That one caused her too many problems and had to be removed. She looked at EVA Unit 01. Now that was an EVA worthy of praise! It was Shinji's Evangelion and it was basically made for him. There was something inhabiting it, some kind of monster. It would explain the times that it went berserk. For example, the first time he piloted it. However, Rei couldn't remember that night; she had been severely injured.

Rei was physically fragile and weak. She was always almost injured, and she was always getting afflicted by various diseases. Yet her body never seemed to die. It almost never gave up, an integral part of her personality. Throughout the broken bones and open wounds, nothing changed.

She was weak, but she was strong. Rei could take any emotional slaughter a person had to offer. She could turn a perfectly calm person into a wild, raving beast by just a simple retort of words. She remembered a time when Dr. Akagi had almost cruelly strangled her with a stethoscope. She was apparently offended by something Rei had said. Realizing she was about to murder a girl, she stopped and became embarrassed. She begged Rei never to tell anyone about the incident, as it would ruin her career. Rei promised never to tell anyone.

Rei felt a lot of people disliked her. She didn't comprehend why people disliked her, but she guessed it had something to do with her personality. No one liked people who didn't talk much or take interest in others. To them, such behavior was odd.

She was odd, and she accepted it, but she wished the other people would accept it as well. It would make things much easier.

Life was never easy, she knew that. Perhaps that's why she enjoyed fighting Angels. To her, fighting Angels was easier than dealing with life. Also, it was a chance for her to show her worth.

She looked at Asuka's Evangelion: EVA Unit 02. That one was German manufactured. It had no special abilities. It never went berserk unlike Unit 01 and it looked very different from the other EVAs. It truly fit Asuka's personality: strange and fiery. It may not have had a mind of it's own like Unit 01, but it was a good vessel and that was very important.

"Rei," Shinji called. He didn't want to upset her, as he had no idea what she was like when angered. "Why are you standing there? We have to go!"

Rei nodded and went in the direction of the bathroom. She opened the door and stepped inside. Slowly, she stripped off her clothing and pulled her suit on. When all was done she pushed opened the door and went back into the room.

She opened the hatch to the entry plug and climbed inside. It was cold, but then again, it was always cold. It was cold until the plasma was put inside. The plasma was a nice toasty warm.

Suddenly she felt the entry plug shake. A mechanical robot was moving it toward her EVA. She closed her eyes as the plug was inserted inside. Soon, the area was filled with LCL, a type of plasma. She didn't panic as it replaced her regular oxygen. She was used to it.

"How is my synch ratio?" she asked one of the officials.

"High," Dr. Akagi answered coldly. It was understandable because Rei knew she didn't like her. Soon Shinji asked the same thing and his question was answered. Both their synch ratios were high.

Misato soon came on the frequency. "Shinji, Rei," she commanded. "We've detected an Angel. It's located in an abandoned field. It has a weak AT field. I want you two to destroy it." She then paused for a second. "Rei, I want you to lead."

"Yes ma'am," both chimed in unison. They were willing to follow any orders that were given to them.

* * *

Asuka rolled her eyes as the Evangelions shot out of the room. "Stupid Wonder girl and Shinji," she muttered to herself. "I could do a better job than them." She sat down. She had seen the Angel on the computer screen. It was huge and domineering. Its thorax was the biggest part, while it's six legs were strong supporters of its body. The only dangerous part was the pinchers in front. Actually, it quite resembled a cockroach, which Asuka hated. She knew she could destroy the Angel easily, but no one gave her a chance. Her synch ratio was too low for the EVA to follow her commands. She pouted and put her head down. Her life sucked.

* * *

EVA Unit 00 moved with ease, maneuvering on the soil like a fish in water. Rei sighed. She did not see the Angel anywhere. Where was it?

"Rei," Shinji asked. "Where's the Angel?"

Rei stared at nothing. "I have no knowledge of where the Angel is," she stated. "All I know is Major told me it would be here."

Shinji sighed. "Don't you wish they gave us better direction?"

Rei shook her head as she heard Shinji's voice on the frequency. "It is our job to help ourselves."

Suddenly a crash was heard. Rei could see something approaching, something large in stature. It was the Angel.

It was grotesque, it resembled a giant cockroach. Rei shivered at the thought of battling such a disgusting creature.

Shinji grabbed his Progresso knife and charged. Rei began to fire at the monster. Shinji's knife struck the Angel's shell, doing no damage. Even Rei's bullets did nothing. Shinji jumped back in shock.

"That was a direct hit," he gasped. Was the Angel invincible? "Rei, do something!"

Rei calmly grabbed a bomb and chucked it at the Angel. The EVAs ran a distance away before hearing a 'boom'. They ran back and found that the Angel was not desecrated by the blast and that it was still in one piece.

The Angel was now angered by the many attempts to kill and began to retaliate. It shot acid on the Evangelions, burning off the paint.

Shinji screamed as he felt the burning pain the acid was causing his EVA. He was afraid he was going to die. He didn't want to die! At that point, he wanted to run away.

Rei winced as she felt a burning pain all over her body. She sat up straighter in an attempt to fight it off. "Ikari," she gasped, sensing he wanted to run. "Don't run away, I need you."

A raw feeling of emotion filled Shinji when she muttered those words. He couldn't leave now. He didn't want her to die. He continued trying to attack the Angel. He jumped on the shell and tried to cut through. He had no such luck of harming the Angel. Instead, the Angel hit him with one of its legs and knocked him across the field. Shinji groaned as he hit the ground; he despised being able to feel the EVA's pain.

"Shinji, Rei," Misato's voice came back on the frequency. "What the hell is going on out there?"

Shinji groaned. "It's invulnerable to our attacks Misato. We can't kill it."

* * *

Back at NERV headquarters Asuka scoffed. "I told you Wonder girl and Shinji couldn't handle this Angel. You're all a bunch of idiots."

Misato turned to Asuka angrily. "Shut up Asuka!" she growled. She became nervous. She didn't want to lose her pilots. "Shinji," she called. "Get yourself and Rei out of there, before anyone gets hurt!"

* * *

Outside, Rei looked at the Angel. Its face was nowhere to be seen. "Why can't I see its face," she whispered to herself. "Where is its face?" She vaguely heard Shinji tell her to go, and she turned to leave. The Angel attacked her from behind. She struggled to get it off, but it latched itself on tight. Its legs were digging into her back.

Rei cried out in pain as she felt needles going through her back. She didn't call for help because she didn't want any.

The Angel began to cover most of the EVA's body. Suddenly, Rei needed to get out, but couldn't. She was trapped.

Shinji noticed this and began firing at the Angel.

* * *

"Shinji, what are you doing?" roared Misato. She couldn't believe it. Her best pilot was out there putting himself in more danger than was necessary.

"The Angel's attaching itself to Rei," he screamed. "It's trying to eat the EVA!" Misato and Asuka were at a loss for words.

"Rei," she yelled, perspiring. "Eject the entry plug!"

* * *

Rei fumbled with the controls as pain washed over her body. She finally pressed the eject button but nothing happened. "I can't get out," she whispered.

"Oh my God…Rei!" Misato flipped out. "Shinji, save her!"

Unit 01 ran over and tried to pull the entry plug out without getting attacked as well. Soon the entry plug was in his hands, but it was slightly crushed. Shinji was worried; he hoped he didn't injure Rei in the process. He couldn't contact her now that she was no longer in the EVA. He hoped she was alright.

He ran back to headquarters while the angel continued to eat Unit 00. It didn't even noticed when he took out the entry plug. It had an obscene way of eating too. It's pinchers moving up and down on the living robot made a weird 'squishy' sound.

* * *

Meanwhile, inside the entry plug, Rei was contemplating death. She looked at her arms. They were covered in blood. She had sustained injuries while Unit 01 was retrieving her. The strong hands had slightly crushed the entry plug. She had very little air left to breath and she was losing consciousness. "Is this what it's like to die?" she asked herself.

* * *

At headquarters, it took a lot of robot power to open the hatch. It finally broke open, and a nearly dead Rei piled out. She gasped as she began to breathe again.

She looked around the room. Her vision was blurry but she just managed to make everyone out. Misato, Dr. Akagi, Shinji, Maya and Asuka were all looking worriedly at her. "I'm…alive," she gasped.

The last thing she heard before the darkness was "Someone, get an ambulance! And Hurry!"


End file.
